Shop Mobile More Submit  Join Login
×
Hey Everypony! Im going to the CMPC (crystal mountain pony con) this year! This year it will be at the Davis conference center July6th- 8th! The tickets are on sale now! go get your tickets here at the website:
crystalponycon.com/

Now if you wanna see me The Director at Crystal mountain pony convention AAAAND want a discount Make sure to use the code: DIRECTOR when checking out! you will save 5% on your tickets! :D WOOT!

Remember use DIRECTOR during checkout! 
I hope to see everypony there! 
Hey guys. do you have a discord server? to you like my work and ponies? Wanna friend to chat with? Do you play games? I do. 
come join the discord server:

discord.gg/mmPSdGh

This is a free and uncensored chat. Feel free to come in enjoy and make some friends. Shitpost... whatever you want. 
Tagged by: :iconwickedhex:

Rules:
You have to re-post these rules 
Each person has to share 13 things about them.
Answer the 13 questions asked to you and then invent 13 questions that the people you'll tag have to answer.
Choose 13 people to tag, if you can.
Tag-Backs Are ALLOWED.
Be creative with the title. No "I've Got Tagged" things
You can't say, "Sorry, I don't do tags."

Facts:
 
1) I am an artist. 
2) I am an animator.
3) I like ponies
4) Sometimes I don't like ponies
5) I like furries.
6) Sometimes I don't Like furries.
7) I tend to eat food.
8) I understand that eating food is a biological necessity to sustain human life. 
9) I Like Your mom.
10) I liked her last night too.
11) Your mom is into some kinky shit.
12) I wouldn't go for your mom again.
13) I hate tag challenges. 


Her Questions:

1) Sega or Nintendo?

Sega is a failure as a company and Nintendo is a gimmick. 

2) Dogs or Cats?

Dogs are dumb and tend shit on the floor. Cats are smart and they STILL SHIT ON THE FLOOR. THEY FUCKING DO IT ON PURPOSE, FUCK CATS!!!1!

3) What's your best day ever?

That one time with your mom. remember that? *wink Wink NUDGE FUCKIN NUUUUDGE*

4) What's your favourite TV show?

I think Maron. Oh hey. an honest answer. WHAT!? Fuck off. I couldn't think of a joke. 

5) Is water really wet?

Was your mom that one time?

6) What do you want to be when you grow up?

Im already grown up. All I want is happiness. Fucking happiness!!! OH GOD WHYYYEEEE!? WHERE DID MY LIFE GO WRONG!? *fucking sobbing and swigs some whiskey* Ahem. 
Whiskey. I just want whiskey. 

7) Do you like my art?

Whos art?

8) Do have a girlfriend or boyfriend? 

Ha. Ha. You think people like me? WELL YOURE RIGHT!!!! :D no.. no.... actually I lied. I lied to make myself feel better. Im lonely. Its crippling. *sips whiskey* ahem.
Whiskey. I have Whiskey.

9) If you really know me and we're friends, what does my username 'Snoopy7c7' stand for?

TRICK QUESTIONN!!! your username isnt SNOOPY! its wickedhex.

10) If you could be in any TV show, movie, book (etc), what would it be?

It would be one that I worked on. Its called, "The Director is rich and gets laid!"
Its very profound and meaningful. 

11) Are you mad that I tagged you? 

Nooooo... nooooooo.... of course not.  Im not some passive aggressive cunt. 

12) Glad we're almost done?

I was with your mom. 

13) Who inspired you to become an artist?

Crippling Depression. 


(I'm too tired to write my own questions so I copy pasted. Sorry.) 



My Questions:

1) If you were to find your best friend dead by hanging in their room, Ketchup or mustard?

2) How do you like your meat? Eaten whole or cut into bite size pieces? 

3) Type 1 key at random on the keyboard followed by, FUCKEN JEWS!!

4) What do you think the COOLEST mode of suicide is!? you cant use hanging! thats cheating, because its the coolest of all!

5) The world is ending. thats it. the world is ending. there is no point in asking questions. WE ARE ALL GONNA DIE!!!

6) Its national Tramp-Stamp day! Everyone must get a tattoo above their ass or they will be shot dead on sight! What tattoo do you get!?

7) How do you deal with the crippling depression? Vodka or suicide?

8) I just came down with a horrible case of Rectal cancer! Roast me Bitches! Rotisserie or or Pit Fire?

9) How do you deal with Crippling happiness? (hint its a lie) Whiskey or suicide?

10) When I get high, I get high on speed! Thats right! I am a RACE CAR DRIVER, who does cocaine! How do you get high? 

12) Its national-get-rid-of-your-tramp-stamp day. Are you still alive?

13) Fuck 11. that guys a cunt right?

14) Heil 14 master number. All other numbers WILL fall in line.


(I'm not going to apologize for my humor.)


I tag:

:iconwickedhex: :iconwickedhex: :iconwickedhex: :iconswordticus: :iconwickedhex: :iconwickedhex: :iconwickedhex: :iconmagnus-corvus:

Sorry everyone whom I tagged but. Its the rules!
So. I been doing shit lately. Really shit. Just. Horrible.
I lost my computer, along with all animation progress. 
I Lost friends. 
I lost work. 
I lost patience. 
Princess Leia died, and so did her fucking mom. 

And of course,
Depression has been BEATING MY ASS. I mean this is nothing new really. Depression regularly chews on my ass like Cow and Chicken. 

Pork butts and taters T-shirt Design by alsnow
Hell, depression chews me out more than any commissioner who WANTS TO FAP RIGHT NOW!!!! ever does. Har har. 

But not this fucker! :iconimzebrony: This dude is fucking super commissioner extraordinaire! 
Seriously. After I lost my assets and stuff, he still wanted me to do the work!!! 
Everyone else wanted a refund. Thats okay. totally cool. Thats completely fine. I wasn't getting the work done in the way that they wanted and thats just how life goes. 
Frustration by jane-beata

I really did think like everyone else he would have wanted a refund. But to my entire surprise that did not happen. He said he wanted me to keep going, even though that meant I had to start from scratch. I did. Im currently neglecting it in order to write this journal. 

I bring him up because he helped. He commissioned an animation originally to help out. but then he helped me out in a way that wasn't particularly financial. My confidence was dead. I thought, "shit I am out of work." 
Just the fact that he wanted me to continue after all that, warmed me. Frankly, I still believe that was more than I deserved. But thank you mate. The smallest of boosts and you gave it to me anyway. Why? No fucking clue. Doesn't make a lick of sense to me but he did anyway. Maybe he just really wanted to get his artwork really damn badly. But either way, it helped me out. 

hug by StupidLittleCreature

Here you go bro. The nicer to me than you ever should have award. 

Now, this isn't going to be a journal of thanks n' shit. This is the only other thanks. just in case you were worried there is no story to be had here. 
Then on with the story.

So I got a little boost in confidence from Imzebrony. But you know I still felt like shit. See I figured that something must be wrong with me. I mean, how could there not be? Im a damn human being! 

A quote I have held with me for many years always resonates within my head. The quote comes from one of my favorite writers, Michael Crichton. 
If anyone recognizes the name its probably because you had watched or read Jurassic Park.

JURASSIC PARK by louboumian

However, the important quote was not from Jurassic Park. 
I found it is his book, "Prey."

  Book Cover - Prey by Michael Crichton by iamjamesporter


The book was a very nice book that follow Michael Crichton's theme of being afraid of technology. Instead of dinosaurs and cloning, we have nano-machines. 

The quote is as follows:

"The brain hangs. The thought process goes and goes, but it doesn't get anywhere. It must be something like that, because we know that people can think about themselves indefinitely. Some people think of little else. Yet people never seem to change as a result of their intensive introspection. They never understand themselves better. It's very rare to find genuine self-knowledge.

It's almost as if you need someone else to tell you who you are, or to hold up the mirror for you. Which, if you think about it, is very weird.

Or maybe it's not."

Fuck if I could remember much else from this book.This left a huge impression on me when I was young. The reason was that it made me think about myself differently. It made me wonder, "How introspective am I really?" 

The Mirror by dark-spider

I had always been sad. Depression was nothing new to me even when I was younger. But it wasn't until shortly after I finished reading that book did my depression really start to kick my ass. It was because, I never realized what a shit person I was. I started looking around at myself and my life and I kept wondering, "Is reality as I perceive it." 

After about a year of keen observation, asking people of their opinions and thinking about what it all could mean. I found out that I was indeed perceiving the world wrong. I realized I was pretty shit person. The world around me is pretty shit too. At least relatively to what I had believed before. 

But I had never realized how much worse it all was. After finding my new world view and how to conduct myself, I didn't continue to realize how fucking wrong I was. Seriously. I really needed someone to hold up the goddamn mirror for me! It was around this time that I got into the brony fandom and was starting to do my work as an animator. 

It wasn't until I per-chance found a bunch of videos from skeptics on youtube, that I started to really see how fucking wrong I could be. They were great. I liked them because their points were very hard to argue with, since they always backed up their positions with math, science and logic. 
They were also pretty fucking funny. 

bear by zip-stock  A photo of Bearing in his natural habitat as well as some of his musical stylings. 

One of these skeptics was Bearing. The reason I have to point this particular skeptic out is because he was really punk. He loved to use the word, "cunt," and he fucking used vulgarity. It made me really comfortable actually. I don't know if any of you reading know this, but I fucking hate censorship. In fact I am worried Orwell's worst nightmares maybe coming true! Why I hate it is a story for another time though...
censorship by racuntikus
But censorship for peoples fucking feelings and convenience in the Brony Community was fucking rampant. Being surrounded by this attitude constantly, wether it was in college or whether it was trying to draw a damn horse I thought there was something wrong with me. Maybe I am just crazy. 

Well, watching these skeptics like Bearing helped me to find out, I wasn't wrong. I totally had the right to express myself regardless of who doesn't fucking like it. 

That wasn't the only thing I learned though. Watching all these videos helped me to learn a lot of the positions that I held, defended and even pressed on people were... very wrong. That was a hard period of time, but I came to accept it. I have also come to recognize the traits in others, and even stand up for myself. I learned a lot, and I will continue to learn. 

So now realizing that a lot of the basis of my life had been wrong... I wondered, "how else I am fucked up?"

Well this nice little song by Bearing was very important in my steps to finding that out.

 

I realized that I was the shit head in the song. Whinging, moaning and fucking complaining. I sent the song to A LOT of my friends, or at least the ones that I still had. 

None of them answered except my brother. Not that I really needed it. People like bearing taught me to look at the facts. I knew I whinged, moaned, and complained...
I even jumped obsessively from project to project being a constant failure instead of having patience. 

My brother gave me only half an answer. Telling me that I don't tend to finish shit ever. Before I even decided to ask anyone about it, :iconmagnus-corvus: quit working and for the most part talking to me for the reasons stated in the damn song. 

Yep. I am, that shit head. 

This is where I'm going to put out a kind of apology.

:iconfallenwish-creations: 
I just wasn't the right fucker. You believed in me for all the things I never was. I think a lot of projection was going on...

Nopony Special [Please Read Description] by FallenWish-Creations

I am not the fucking special guy you thought I was. I a bit of a cunt. Frankly, I didn't quite really figure that out what the fuck I am until now. Fuck, even then I might not fucking know. 

My track record is shit. I don't know what else I am going to find out that I am a shit head for. 
But, I hope you know, that appreciated the company all the way up till here. Even if you had some really fucking cunty moments. 

Time to move on. 

Another person who really helped me out was Shadman. The Shadman. No not personally. But in the same way Bearing did, with his videos. I didn't even know he had a youtube channel. Nor would I have particularly gone searching for it. I was never a big fan of his artwork. But a video of his showed up in my suggestions box. I thought, "wuuuuuut Shad has a fucking youtube channel!?" So I watched it out of morbid curiosity. 

Turns out. He is inspirational as fuck. He is metal as fuck. His story about how he came to success rivaled my admiration of how Kevin Smith did it. 
Here is the video in particular:


He completely inspired me in a new fucking way. 
Remember that shit I said about Prey and the mirror?
Shad showed me something completely important. In the process of trying to be introspective I did somethings absolutely wrong.

1. I completely reject the person I was before reading that book as if everything that he was, was wrong. Even the good parts, and the parts I genuinely liked. 

2. I was trying to fit into a new box that I had no business being in. Yes I liked ponies, yes the community I was in was sometimes full of shit, and yes they hated me. They often hated me when trying to conform to what they thought was right and when I thought I was crazy for thinking the way I do. 

3. I forgot to be fucking metal. I forgot what I really liked. In fact I actively ignored it, when instead I should have been using it to express myself. I like sexy chicks and banging, I like horror, blood, guts torture and things that make my skin fucking crawl. I love booze and my smoking my cigars!  I fucking love DARK and AWKWARD humor. I love being vulgar and uncensored. I love fucking loud guitars and depressing shit. 

I should have been doing things my way from the beginning. Mostly because I never did shit wrong in the first place when it came to my artist career. I should have been candid and honest. So I am heading that way. I can't forget who I am. 

Shadman, You made me wanna fucking do art the right way. Jam on you fucking magnificent cunt. 




Now not all of the people who helped me learn something were simply just people I don't know personally. There were actually people in my life who really did make a difference. 

Of course I learned a lot about relationships and their needs from with :iconfallenwish-creations:

But there is someone who really helped me combat my fears. 
:iconcrandaaj:

This guy saw something in me. I have no Idea what it was. But he regularly would talk to me, and help me out. The amazing part was that was how he thought about every problem I took him. He could take the most complex of my woes and boil it down to some very simple and optimal solutions. 

He does this in a mere matter of SECONDS. Every time I wonder how he fucking does it! Maybe I can achieve the amazing guru thought processes that this guy has. 

I swear this man has infinite fucking patience. He totally deals with my depression and other bullshit REGULARLY! It maybe due to who he is. He tends to work in Security. Probably deals with fucking people pissing in bottles outside of buildings, high and drunk people lost, and staring at doors. Maybe my bullshit is so insignificant compared to what he deals with in the job he loves so much, that what I do doesn't matter. 


Security guard Mark! by xNIR0x

Either way, thanks mate. I have friends who avoid me. You aren't one of them... and its amazing. 

But it doesn't end there! 
For whatever reason, he cared enough to help me fix myself as a person!

I gotta tell you, I have really bad social anxiety. Groups of people used scare me. I got over that in a fairly decent manner. 
But I am deadly afraid of talking to people............. On the internet. yes. everyone facepalm. 

The reason it scared me so much was I was always worried that I could never represent myself correctly. I was scared of pissing people off unintentionally or friends coming to hate me over something I said. In real life, I got over my fear of interacting with people by learning language and becoming very emotive. I am actually very comfortable with that now. But online? I don't have my hands, or my tone to help me get my jokes across. Sarcasm is very hard to discern! After all Poe's Law exists for a reason!

Friendly Sarcasm by dinyctis

Yeah, my fear was doubled not only knowing how, "Metal," I wanna be, but also how SARCASTIC my humor was. 

Then along came :iconcrandaaj: 
He would give me tips, tricks and critiques about interacting with people both in real life, and on the internet. 
But his favorite techniques, was being Papa bird and fucking KICKING me into social situations where I would either die or survive! Though he was empathetic the whole time. 

It fucking worked. After a shitload of practice. LIKE A SHITLOAD. Months of practice, I finally decided to give it a real hard and sincere try!

With Crichtons introspectiveness, Bearings sheer logical honesty, Shadmans true-to-self lessons, and :iconcrandaaj: 's teachings. I finally went onto all my social platforms and am trying to interact with people, be candid, and enjoy putting out artwork honestly to my humors to find people to spend time with and work with. 

SO far, its been great!
Order Compulsive commission with cutie mark by Crandaaj

So big fat fucking huge thank you to you! If there is anyone I firmly believes deserves more head, its this guy!

Seriously thought. He's handsome. Strong security man, loves a nice vest and bowtie, some comfy slacks. Soft speaker too, very kind gentleman. Clever as all hell as was stated before. 

On the inside, this dude is metal as fuck. He has his fair share of GRIT man! 
A beautiful paradoxical mixture of fine dining, and being a hard badass. James bond would blush. 
Bond... James Bond by Tozani

Now that I had a very interesting adventure online, one particular fellow came out of no-where to revitalize my love of art in majestic ways. 

:iconbrandoch-daha: 

This guy showed up from the ether to leave a comment on one of my OLD OLD drawings. One that I particularly look down at. 
Ill miss you by The-Directors-Cut
He came to this and saw something in it. What? No clue. But it was profound. I had condemned this long ago to my shit pile and this guy just came out of nowhere and was completely inspired and asked me if he could draw her. Made me think, "maybe I should bring back and work on strays again somehow?" I dunno... its a bit of a scary thought. 

But what really solidified the meaning and profoundness for me was this:

Vulpes Vixen Mathematica by Brandoch-Daha

He painted this. He brought back the meaning of the beautiful Vixen I once loved to paint. Not only did he see something in the drawing, But he captured everything perfect. He put both mine and his soul into this work. I know it was a quick piece for him but... man. He is a real fucking artist. 

He showed me that, I am still the fine artist I wanted to be. Everything that made layla and the artwork of old... was still beautiful, and that there is no reason for me to not return to it. Especially since It wasn't finished. Strays was never done... It only started and I left such a great and beautiful idea behind. 

And if I learned anything from Bearing's still listening, I need to stop being that shit head and finish my work.

PLEASE I encourage everyone to click on his piece of artwork and not only enjoy it, BUT PLEASE READ, the critique I had left. I can't tell you how deeply this piece touched my heart and soul. 

:iconbrandoch-daha: If you're around. I really feel like I owe you. 
Keep painting you beautiful man. 
Ill keep going too. 

Mt Robson 72 by Brandoch-Daha

That brings me to my final point. Once I get all my last Pony things squared away, I want to work on other things besides ponies. Don't worry Ill finish what I start. No worries. I got some really cool and badass stuff coming up in regards to pony content~!

But once Im done, It will not be my focus anymore. I really do wanna get back to Strays and other furry stuff. I'll probably still work on ponies, but I will be expanding quite a bit. 

Until then, please enjoy all my work! Fuck it. Even after then ENJOY IT! I hope to be candid and beautiful in my work! I hope that my soul can come out onto the animations and canvases to which I paint and you can call me not just an artist you like, but a friend. I hope my artwork brings me closer to not just the people in this journal but ALL OF YOU READING.




Thanks everyone who stuck around till the end. And Goodbye horses!

This is my first journal in a long time... Huh. Feels weird. I know this is normally where I place my commissions prices, but that can wait. This Has been by far the best birthday I have had in YEARS. There are some people to really thank!

Cake by chasekinder22

BUT FIRST!!!! A story... 

One day I was hanging around playing Metal Gear Solid with :iconfallenwish-creations: and then she randomly said to me, "Your friend wants to come over and hear you DJ." 

Oh yeah... I am a DJ. Huh... I need to open up more. Anyway! SO I set up a DJ booth in my house. Soon... All of my friends show up with BOOZE. 
Fallen had AMASSED so many friends to come hang out. I haven't seen them in so long. I could cry. 

so... my first thank goes off to :iconfallenwish-creations: 
thanks for working so hard, and thank you for the great gifts! 

Big Boss and Eva [Happy Birthday Director] by FallenWish-Creations

Artwork of me and fallen. I love MGS.

Next I wanna thank :iconswordticus: 

He made me my Deviant ID. Go check it out: the-directors-cut.deviantart.c…

Thaaaaanks sword. 

:iconcoinslay: Thank you. 

I met her back at the CMPC. she was kind, cool, and a great artist. So far is has been a lasting friend :D

Happy birthday dude! by coinslay
This awesomeness is the result of the ever so awesome coinslay's hand. I can't tell you how much I miss you, and everyone else from the con. I can't tell you how much it means to me that you were there... I make you something to repay you for hard work. 

:iconsillyerkiller:

yes. I am thanking you. Not only were you fun to talk to. BUT HOLY HELL mate! I just met you, and you made me a birthday present AND in great humor too! That is Kindness. I love it. Thank you so much. 

This is a joke but I couldn't help myself XD by SillyerKiller

Look at this beauty. its funny, because its completely true. look at that nice traditional touch. Theres more too!



HAPPY BIRTHDAY The-Directors-Cut! by SillyerKiller

I feel so beautiful. :heart:


:iconcrazy-summer-magic:

:iconfire-torchie-heart:

What can I say. You two deal with Dick Jokes and innuendo and you still showed up. thanks.  



Happy Birthday Director by Fire-Torchie-Heart



And Finally Thanks to everyone who left messages. I love the hell outa all you guys!

 *Prices are estimates and are Negotiable.

Make sure to send me a note if you want a commission. 

I Do NSFW.
Erotica is not out of the question. 

If you wanna commission me, Throw a note at me with speed and skill rivaling a ninja with the intent to kill!

Animation:
+ $50 per puppet I need to create. 
+ $30  per Background I need to draw. 
+$20  Per hour of work after background and character creation. 
* Price can be negotiated on Complexity. More complex and difficult to make things will cost more, and more simple and easy to make things will be less costly.

You Really Don't Get It. by The-Directors-Cut

No Need For Pleasantries. by The-Directors-Cut A Romantic Gesture by The-Directors-Cut



Icons:
+ $8 for icon
*examples comings soon*

Simple still (Non-animated) Art:
+ $25 per character.
+ $10 for color
+ $5 shading
+ $5 for background.
* Price can be negotiated on Complexity. More complex and difficult to make things will cost more, and more simple and easy to make things will be less costly.

VidaxByter (commissioned by Vida) by The-Directors-Cut  I Don't Know how To Help You Friend. by The-Directors-Cut  Ghost (commission) by The-Directors-CutElectric Finger (FNGRxTesla) commish for Tezla by The-Directors-Cut


Detailed still (Non-animated) Art:
+ $50 Per character
+ $20 for color
+ $10 for shading
+ $10 for background
* Price can be negotiated on Complexity. More complex and difficult to make things will cost more, and more simple and easy to make things will be less costly.
Who Reads the Comic Sans? by The-Directors-Cut   A Moment with Dr. Wolf: Static Characters. by The-Directors-CutUnspoken Truth (My Tongues Depressed) by The-Directors-Cut



In case you have not seen it yet. Here is the second Teaser Trailer to the show we have been working on.
I hope it gets you excited. Please be excited! And make sure to Like, Comment, and Subscribe! And makes sure to show your friends! 
YAAAY~ 
also watch me on DA for more!

Here it is Everpony! The Trailer for the new series I have been bustin' my balls over! I hope you guys like it! AS I would like to continue working on it! I had a lot of fun working on it!

Make sure to watch me and subscribe on Youtube!!!
You know what I feel a lot of? SAD! Do you know know how I deal with that!? BY WORKING ENDLESSLY TO DISTRACT ME FROM MY HORRID REALITY! 

So here is your reward to all the fuckers who sat around and picked on me, shunned me, hurt me, betrayed me... and overall made me feel shitty! YEP! I'm so depressed I am taking extraneous amounts of time to make something special! 


Future Project by The-Directors-Cut

Let us all hope that I can feel shitty enough and depressed enough to work on it more.  

But aside from feels, you know what else helps to make things like this happen? YOUR SUPPORT!!
If there is genuine interest within this project, PLEASE SHOW IT. It is nice to know that I am not working to look up my own arse! 

That... and its nice to know if someone actually gives a shit. 

Summer Showers,
and Cold Winter Rain.
By Ryan Martin.

 

Here I am feeling chipper,

I think I’m over it

Trying to be cool and feeling hipper.

I think I am ready.

It has been something I dreaded,

I’ll take it slow and move steady,

It’s been months since I faced it,

Its been trying on my will power

But I can’t quit with victory so close

I can taste it!

The shower.

Don’t laugh you don’t understand.

Yes I have heard the joke,

“Not even Moses in the desert sand…”

Things have gotten difficult,

Since the summer ended

While the winter settled in.

You haven’t heard? Oh…

 

My life had gone through its warmest,

Bright is the sun of my life.

The driving sun was pushing me my farthest.

None compares to the summer energy,

That gets one going, up and at em!

Between her-self and I was synergy…

 

Showering wasn’t always so hard!

Used to do it all the time,

Whilst singing like a bard.

Contrary to popular belief

I actually like soap sometimes,

And smelling nice is a relief.

Lately though it has been a damper.

No pun intended.

Just been tossing clothes in the hamper.

The problem is

Bathrooms are watery temples to the mind.

 

Step in I shall

As a monk to a space of meditation.

Scented candles lead my way.

To the special chamber I go.  

The water rushes over me

Like a waterfall.

I close my eyes

And time became endless.

I feel the warmth.

Like the rays of the sun.

Sun is your embrace,

Strong, perpetual, certain to be there.

That smell of lilac,

Its comfort knowing she’s there.

Then my eyes open,

Meditation is over.

 

Cold wind started blowing in.

It did create a shiver,

Ignoring it to be happier than ever been.

It was really a warning.

I should have paid attention,

My world would stop warming.

 

Dreaded so it will be,

To take the showers now.

If you been following, you should see

That in winter, air turns cold.

Senses get a chill, deep chill…

Still there are the warm feelings of old.

No, I’m not referring to temperature of the room.

Stop laughing, the pain isn’t too fun!

Cleaning up my act is not as easy as getting a broom.

But here I go, I’m still going to try.

I am a good monk anyway,

Let us hope I don’t break down and cry.

Back to the temple,

In I walk with a bit of a tremble.

 

Step in I shall

As a monk to a space of meditation.

Scented candles lead my way.

To the special chamber I go. 

The water rushes over me

Like a waterfall.

I close my eyes

And time became endless.

I feel the warmth.

Like the rays of the sun.

Sun is your embrace,

Strong, perpetual, certain to be there.

That smell of lilac,

Its comfort knowing she’s there.

Then my eyes open,

Meditation is over.

 

The Summer Showers have become Cold Winter Rains.

But you knew water runs cold in winter… Right?

I didn’t. 

    Just as it says. I guess I am not okay. So I been seeing a therapist for various reasons. I am trying to be okay, and it has been hard. 
Yeah you can probably guess why...
    I had recently broken up with my girlfriend. I know I tell you all that I been fine, and that I have been feeling fine. Thats not exactly not true. The problem is I had been lying to myself, and I was so close to believing that lie... or I might have believed my own lie. But, no, I am really not okay. Those, "fine," feelings were just a lie... feeling a lie. 
Depression by DestinyBlue
    Truth be it I am barely hanging on by a thread. I been using any kind of escape I possibly can just to feel better for a second... If only for a second. Drawing, writing, poetry, movies, animation, drinking, sleeping and so on... I am trying really fucking hard. But the main thread that keeps me going is still her. I still feel really great when I talk to her. Too bad I know I only give her pain. 
    Yeah, I am pretty sure you're all fucking sick of this, and fucking sick of me. 

Go on, and leave now before you get sick to your stomach about it. Cuz here it comes. 


[This is a pretty good representation of my feelings. I wonder who I am?]

I love her, and I miss her a lot. Putting away artwork and hiding stuff from my sight has not helped. I trashed a few things too. 
Someone was giving me advice... Remember why you broke up. Remember that there was a reason. The sad reason is that she fell out of love with me. I am fading like her feelings. I am glad she ended it before it was a lie to say, "I love you." It was mature move. I guess as good as any but...

The fact that nothing was wrong, is something that has bothered me deeply. We never fought. We were fairly happy together. She told me many times that I was the best...  She made sure to let me know that it wasn't my fault. I know that it was no ones fault. That is a good thing right?

Truthfully, there is this part of me that really wishes something was wrong. I wish I had done something wrong to make the feelings go, I wish I was at fault. If I had just fucked it up somehow, I would been able to say, "Goddam my stupid ass, I need to learn from my mistakes and I will do better next time." 

Or, she could have done something... something that could make me say, "oh that was no good... she wasn't good for me... let me curse her name."

But everything was perfect and fine in my eyes. That leaves me with some... things lingering...

The Break-up by FrameFrozen

That perfect happiness I had with her was very real to me. In fact I was never more certain of anything in my life. It felt great. Yeah I had been in lots of relationships, but none of them ever made me feel this love, none left such a great impression on me, none where quite as special as this was. Truthfully, I never had these feelings towards anyone else... ever. 

And the things we went through, I only feel strengthened our bond... or so I thought...

Anyways, the horrid feeling is that since everything was so fine. I have this feeling like I still have a chance. Even if I don't I still want to be her friend very bad. I want to be with her in some way... She really does make me happy. I still love her. 

Sadly its these little hopes that maybe we can be, somehow, something, somewhere, sometime; that keeps me going. 

Love hurts... by adrianabueno

Now to be completely honest. I don't think I will ever stop loving her. I have no idea how that will affect me or my future, and my future interactions with her. Yeah... I been pretty sad without her. Just 2 months really left a big, deep impression on me. 

I really am trying my best, but my best is proving to not be enough. It also proved to not be enough in our relationship. Seemed nothing I could do would ever keep us together all lovey dovey... at least on her end. 

From what I have seen, I'm not the only one being ripped apart by this. Yeah, she hasn't been doing too hot either. She probably feels just as bad as I do, if not worse.
If she ever reads this. I am sorry I said I was fine when I was not. I care so much about you, and I really wanted to be strong for you. I wanted to help when clearly I cannot. 

Love hurts by Alephunky

It is not just her either. It has also been pressing on my friends. If there is one thing I feel like I fucked up on, it was trying to get her. No no no... Do not get me wrong. I do not regret one moment that I shared with that amazing woman. I love every moment deeply. 
It was all very special to me. But...

It was our relationship that had driven plenty of friends away... I lost a few... and many of my friends drifted away from each other, me as well as her. It saddens me deeply. Cuz I remember and miss those days when we would all hang out like the bestest fucking pals on the whole goddamn planet! Me, her, them, us, we... all together on those long ass fucking calls day and night, shooting the shit and laughing up a storm. 

If I had not tried to be a bit selfish and get the girl, what would have happened? Would we all still be together in those long ass calls? Would we still all be together? Would I still be the closest friend she ever had? who knows... I won't... I never will. If I could go back in time and try all over again I still would have tried to be with her despite... Because that is just how much I do love her. 

Lost Love by NikzSmiileyface

So here I am. After seeing my therapist today, I realize that there was only one half-truth that I told today. 

"Do you feel suicidal?" I was asked.

"No." I had replied. This is only half true. I kinda don't feel like being of this Earth, but I keep going because I hope that at the very least I will be able to interact with her in the future... 

And I know she hasn't been feeling too attached to the world either. At the very least, this is where I can be strong for her. I am gonna stick around just so that I can watch her stick around. I know I cannot help her. I thank a certain someone for helping her the best he can... He would know who he is... she knows too. 

But nonetheless I shall stay here, because I very much want her to stay here too. If she ever, "left," I would be utterly fucking devastated. I believe in her with all my heart... No matter what, I will always try my best to be there for her when she needs me.

I know I have been saying, "I love her," a lot. So... I would like to give some credit where credit really is due.
Here are people... who I also love with all my heart:

:iconswordticus: Because you took my shit. All the time. You listened to me cry and whine and complain... You heard more about her than anyone else on the planet and did so with the intent to help throwing out advice, suggestions and help left and right. I am your biggest headache. Even when I cursed you for all you were worth you still listened with sympathetic ears. You tried so hard for my hopeless ass... and despite anything and everything you believed in me and her when we were together... and now you believe in me still. Fuck you for being so fucking great to me you fucking asshole... I... appreciate it with all my heart. I hope you know I do. 
You if anyone deserve to see these words:
I love you Sword. Thank you. 

:iconsharkdiscusses: Because simple and cleanly, you were there the entire fucking time. Day 1 you were there. When I left you in the dust for a girl, you fucking smiled and wished me happiness. You looked at my smile and it gave you warmth even when you were at a distance. You were there to listen to me brag about how amazing she was. You were there the moment she left... You were there every moment I cried about her, and you stayed your own feelings. And you know what!? Despite me being the asshole I am, you're still fucking here! You been there more than anyone. Even if it was just to let me be depressed on your lap... you were fucking there. 
Yes. you really fucking deserve what I am about to say:
I love you Shark. I really do. 

You two really deserve my love. 

  hug by Ende26


Alright... this is the part where you probably would judge the most. Well I am not gonna take any shit on this one. So... If you have anything to say that isn't majorly constructive: FUK ARF! 

I am still out looking for love. Yeah... I am. For many reasons. 

I can't sleep, function or eat when I'm not with someone. 
I have more than a broken and scarred up heart. I am a pretty broken man...

I really need large amounts of emotional support... and help fixing myself. I don't have all the supplies I need to mend a heart, mind or body like this. 
Yeah it is really hard what happened between me and her. But, She asked this of me... And... not only am I doing this for her, but also for me. 
Will I ever get over her? No... this experience is trauma. Will I learn to cope? Yes... I would like a little help... from new love. If anyone wants a desperate broken fool. There is no application. Just have at me.  I know there is already someone with an eye out for me...
He knows who he is.

To anyone who actually stuck through that and read all that. Thank you. I mean it. You did not have to one bit. It means a lot to me if you did. Anyway, go ahead and destroy the comments. Go nuts.

Hopefully your favorite heartache of a man. 
The Director~
So... Back in January, I joined Channel Frederator.
There on my first day, I met a woman. Great artist... Dreams of doing animation. Completely talented. She was quite amazing.
Of course I had no balls to talk to her. So I started making up projects for her and I to work on. Excuses I could use to talk to her any way I could. This included, "Ponylands." I don't know if I will cancel it or not... but... I guess we will see.
Anyway...
One day someone made a Channel Frederator chat group on Skype. They told me to add any Frederators. This was my big excuse to get to talk to her anytime. I was so excited. So of course I added her. 
Yeah I was pretty scared at first. Hardly had the balls to talk. I joined a call like 5 or 6 times and dropped out since I was so nervous and scared. Not just nervous to talk to her, but nervous cuz there were others around too. 
But I worked up the courage to do it. I did!! Then I started to get to know the love of my life and my two best friends. Life right there was... Okay. Pretty okay. 
We were such great friends that we made our own group just for us to hang out. She definitely grew in my heart. It was like my home.... But I have to say, that during that time I was severely depressed. A few days after I finally talked to her, I was planning to shoot myself. Yeah suicide. But, there was a knot in my chest. I did not want to die with tension. I had loved her already. So, I decided I was going to at least tell her before I would off myself. That would life a great weight off my shoulders.
I made up something about a bet to ask her if she liked me. I told her that I made a bet with my friend, that if I ask her out and she rejects me I get 50 bucks. I told her that she doesn't have to be afraid of rejecting me since I would get money. It wasn't true, but I didn't want her to feel pressured. 
But to my utter surprise, she said she had liked me back. I was so happy and elated. "No. Nope. I am not gonna die today," I thought to myself. And so began the happiest time of my entire life. 
From there I spent large amounts of time talking to her and my friends... Flirting... Finally. My friends even kept encouraging her to get with me. Finally! I decided to do it... But in the most special way I could.
I went on my podcast and I asked her out right at the end of it. 
Only hours later, she said yes. I became the happiest man on the planet. 
For days, we exchanged the most beautiful messages. They all filled with me with warmth. Poetic, true and full of love. This was the most real thing I ever had. I never felt so happy or alive.... Especially since I spent my whole life utterly depressed all the time. I still have every one of those messages saved. Every last beautiful thing she wrote for me. She even made really amazing poetry... even artwork. 
I have never felt love before. She was the only one I could ever want. So perfect. Like my other half. She saved my life and fixed me in everyway. 
I also made poems, and comforted her... and made artwork...
Then, German Cupcakes happened. Many of you know that story. But instead of retelling it, you can simply read this other journal:
You Can't Help Everyone, But Thanks for Helping UsI learned that loud and clear. You can't help everybody. Over the last like... I can't even remember how long, lots of things have been happening. Let us re-count a little:
A while ago I met :iconbefishproductions: and we fell in love together. It was kinda awesome. 
I helped :iconbefishproductions: ward off a bully, who physically hurt her, cyberbullied her and so on. Refer to: 

Then from here, all kinds of things had happened. Refer to my loves journal here:

Because of mean persons actions and her constant want to get at Befish, a lot of this happened:

Needless to say everything was hard on us both and very stressful. Everything that happened to her, happened to me in kind, and we shared the pain between us. 

I'll admit throughout the whole thing I kinda felt like Scott Pilgrim. This useless guy who kinda sits around,
 

Yeah it was really tough and a lot of things went on. Ex's bullying. I did so much for her. 
We planned to spend the rest of our lives together. I was right there with the whole idea... I loved her with every ounce of my being. 
I started saving up money to go visit her. Something strange happened... She started to grow distant. She said it wasn't my fault... but... I firmly believe it was. I think I really fucked it up. 
But I kept going for her sake. I kept going because I loved her. I even ran away to get a job so I could have enough money to be with her. 

After a while... this happened:
Well.... things escalated today...Okay guys, this is gonna be some really odd news for a lot of you. 
And maybe a bit heart breaking. 
But of course, everyone here knows what DirFish is
If you don't, it's me and The-Directors-Cut
Now.... we technically just made that pairing "Uncanon"
Or rather, on a serious note, I broke up with him. 
From a lot of you, I probably won't hear the end of it.
But, at least let me explain myself. 
Now first of all, Ryan really wanted to spend his life with me, and everyone feels that when their in a relationship.... but I'm only 15, and I kinda want to live my life before getting all serious with someone. 
And for another thing, I get really stressful in a relationship. It really does stress me out, even when they say dirty friends, it gets really bad in my head, so.... I guess this one was kinda attacking me. 
And.... my feelings kinda faded away for him. This happens a lot in relationships, I'll think their amazing, and I'll love them to death.... but th


Listen.... I thought I could take this break up. But I couldn't. When I got the message... I cried for 2 hours straight before my heart literally stopped over it. My limbs went cold... I was numb... I lost all control of my limbs and my vision started to fade. Yeah, my body quit. I could hardly take it. My friend had to call the paramedics to help out. 

Some would say I was fine after that. But... I wasn't. I cried all the way home... cried some more... cried a lot. She was my reason for getting out of bed in the morning. 

So forgive me... But, I don't feel like doing anything anymore. No. None of this is her fault. I was depressed already. This... This is true sadness and trauma. I feel utterly sick. And above all... I miss her. so fucking much. 

And now... all the artwork... and everything we had done together is gone and swept away like I never existed. What was I worth anyway? it... I don't know...

I love her still.... with all my heart. I ... I don't think this will ever go away. I don't know how to say this... but she really was perfect in every way. She was the only person I could ever love...

And its gone. I feel... very gone.

you probably wont see a video, or artwork from me... from a very long time... if you're lucky. I have no motivation anymore. I am done. 
I learned that loud and clear. You can't help everybody. Over the last like... I can't even remember how long, lots of things have been happening. Let us re-count a little:

A while ago I met :iconbefishproductions: and we fell in love together. It was kinda awesome. 

I helped :iconbefishproductions: ward off a bully, who physically hurt her, cyberbullied her and so on. Refer to: 
HELP! Can We Not love?I love BefishProductions so much. But apparently there are people who don't want me too.
Sweet-Doll-Face <------  Doesn't think I should be with Miss Befish. Aside from harrassment, bullying and hurting :iconBefishProductions: German cupcake has been blackmailing my beloved... trying so hard to break us apart. Thank you for anypony who supports us. Can we please end this? I just wanna be with my love.
German-Cupcakes has even flagged a comment on her channel where someone spoke the truth:
==================================================================================
"Everyone subbed to this girl needs to dump her like a sack of potatoes.  She has been cyber-bullying :iconBefishProductions: and is currently blackmailing her into breaking up with her boyfriend, whom she saved from suicide.  She seems to believe that blackmail is not illegal (it totally is), and that she has a right to crush someone to make herself feel better about her own life (
Relationship Update: A NEW DEAL!Recently I had a moment to sit down and speak on rational terms with :iconGerman-Cupcakes: 
I had made a deal between us. The Deal is, that she will no long speak to or interact with :iconbefishproductions: and Mizz Befish will not Interact or speak with German-Cupcakes. 
On these Happy and very reveling new conditions, I would like to end the Boycott now that she has agreed to leave us be. 
I appreciate what German Cupcakes has done in this respect. Finally I believe that me and Mizz Befish can be happy together. 
I love you Sarah very much. Thank you German Cupcakes for being considerate to us both. I hope we can all be happy now in the end. Let not History repeat itself.
Thank you everypony for all of your support and everything you have done. 


Then from here, all kinds of things had happened. Refer to my loves journal here:
Not again...So, if you are a Brony, 40% or more of you found my page through The-Directors-Cut, or many other bronies, when the torment of German-Cupcakes came along. 
Well, something's started again.
As you all have heard (At least those paying attention), my CoFounder and Writers of K&M quit and stopped being my friend.
AS I HAVE JUST BEEN TOLD
A Skype group has recently been made, and named, by German-Cupcakes, as "The Befish Reject Group". This includes all my real friends, who are still mine, and the friends I have recently lost. Obviously, the entire group is entirely against ME
As of along with that, while Apolloheartlock and Paulisaderp were in a call with her, Ryan(Apolloheartlock) called me on my cell phone and let me listen to the entire thing. It was heart wrenching to know, not just of what she was saying, but that Paul was agreeing with her, when none of this was true. She was saying of how TERRIBLE I was being to one of my r


Because of mean persons actions and her constant want to get at Befish, a lot of this happened:

Unspoken Truth (My Tongues Depressed) by The-Directors-Cut

Needless to say everything was hard on us both and very stressful. Everything that happened to her, happened to me in kind, and we shared the pain between us. 

Scott Pilgrim by gearsofcrabs
I'll admit throughout the whole thing I kinda felt like Scott Pilgrim. This useless guy who kinda sits around, fell in love with a girl, who is unique and way out of his league...
SCOTT PILGRIM by captainosaka
 I fought evil exes and dealt with heartache up and down. Now my purpose and reason is :iconbefishproductions: I love her so much...

You know what did not happen in Scott Pilgrim? Scott never had to fight his friends...

Fighting is Magic: Pinkie Pie by Yoka-the-Changeling  pony-dog-fight by DasDreadNought
What a mess. My contacts list grew shorter with each day. Its not like I wanted to fight them. This was the first time in my life that I could not remain entirely neutral. 

In the beginning I really tried being a neutral party. I thought maybe by helping solve everyones problems and making everyone happy would make everything end? I mean it sounds good in theory... right?

Well if you're here now you can probably tell that it did not work out at all. The problem for a lot of people involved was, us being together and being us. Both me and :iconbefishproductions: thought we could fix a lot of things... when neither of us were able to. In the end, the whole thing was forcing me to take sides, since this started to become pretty black and white fast. 

For the first time in my life I took a real stance on something. I chose :iconbefishproductions: above everyone else. 

We both lost friends to the bloody mess. I couldn't help them... If there were not on opposite sides of the battlefield, we could have had a drink together. 

Yeah it all hurt and sucked. Imagine carrying around a load of bricks on your back and everyday someone kicks you in the knee to try to make you full, while another puts more bricks on your back. 

I feel good though... I didn't collapse. I couldn't, I had to be strong for :iconbefishproductions:.
She was pretty strong for me too...  I never had someone stick with me through so much, and I had never stuck anyone for this. This must truly be love. 



I guess its time for both of us to move forward together, and leave the past behind. Why? There is nothing left to do with this shattered glass of a happening. Yeah its a mess, but there is no point in trying to clean it, you will get cut if you pick up the glass. Just walk away. 

Sides, we should leave the past behind because clearly, we have a great future together. I never felt closer to anyone in my life. After all we had gone through we came out really strong. 

Though things seem down and bleak, things have definitely gotten better for the both of us. Lots of little things, like the way she says I love you, to the way she carries herself. She has been making me feel pretty good as of late too. 

But the real Proof that we have a good future, a reason to continue and all the love in the world is right here:
<da:thumb id="525860324"/> <da:thumb id="527512287"/>  Just one big party by Thomastommyboy  Commission -- Sarah and Director by Something-Borrowed   ~He Is Mine!~ Art Trade by mariahjc  Sleep by starlight2213  Angry Gurmen cupcake by starlight2213   Ryan and Sarah by NaitaidaiFoxxoll Commission: Love by Trollan-gurl22   ( MLP ) Pony Couple Commissioned Necklace by KrazyKari <da:thumb id="525093033"/> <da:thumb id="524925831"/>  Foals in Love [request] by Pristine1281  Director and Befish by MarieDRose   Ship Befish and Director (Dirfish) by Thomastommyboy  

Thank you everyone, for all the hard work, regardless of the circumstances for it. Overwhelming support, not just from each other, but from others. There are so many who have helped support the DirFish OTP, and not just in drawings either!

Just a few who deserve great thanks for their large amounts of support:

:iconcomicsanspony:
:iconthomastommyboy:
:icontherealforlong:
:iconpristine1281:
:icongeekystev:
:iconanimewolfgamer:
:iconred-cord-player:
:iconmariedrose:
:iconrigifan32:
:iconswordticus:
:iconmagnus-corvus:
:iconbritishbronyreviewer:

You all in particular helped out by making art. Or listening to my cry and whine, some of you had to go through long long talks about why Sarahs Buttcheeks are amazing. But for what you guys did. You all did way too much for me and Sarah to even list. Thanks a ton! 

Here are some people who I owe some special thanks too:

:icontechnotewubs: For being an example of what a good relationship should be. 

:icondrwolf010: Forgiving me advice, and helping me through some of my depression. 

:iconmad--munchkin: For keeping me calm by talking about good music with me, and giving me advice on the complicated crap.

:iconstarlight2213: For being one of the BIGGEST Dirfish supporters, making more Dirfish art than even me or Sarah did! There are some other things you helped with... you know what I am talking about. Thanks.

:iconlightning-bliss: For not only giving me advice, but giving Sarah advice too! Boy can't tell you what a mouthful she gets when i come crying to her about my relationship problems!

:iconmintyroot: For cheering me up through my depression and keeping me going. You really helped out Minty, even if you don't feel like you did much. Ever little bit helps. 

:iconczair: for keeping me company, helping with my really bad social anxiety, and being a voice of reason in all the haze of my mind.

:iconheadlongequestria:  For keeping my love company and cheering her up where I could not. Also for being gay for Tsitra; yeah that really means a lot to me, you really have no idea... (however on a nice side note, I resent you for like 23% because :iconbefishproductions: makes more artwork of the Tsilong ship than of DirFish.... Gives me some wonky ass Vibes... but thats not your fault headlong, that is my fault for being a jealous, moronic, jerk douche-schnozzle who wants all of Sarahs attention like... all the time.)

:iconstardust2755: You definitely got ears girl. From poetry, to me crying... you listened to it all... Jeez. I almost feel like it was abuse for you. 

:iconsausesource: for giving kind rational advice, cuz he knows I am an idiot. This is the guy I go to when I need SERIOUS help.  (really hope this is Gibbontake. Im guessin right now.)

I am sure there are plenty more who deserve thanks. If you do, go ahead and make yourselves known and your contribution in the comments bellow.

Finally most importantly:





Thank you :iconbefishproductions: for loving me and allowing me to be happy with you. :heart: Thank you so much for allowing my Only True Pairing to exist. You and me. I don't wanna be with anyone else. I mean that with all my heart. I never felt closer to anyone. I literally cannot live without you.

I want you to look back at this journal, not only see what we can and have overcome together, but realize that both you and I have such immense support behind us and with us all the way. I want you to see how strong we have been together and how you have helped me so very much, and I hope I helped you just as much. 

But most importantly I wanna finally move away from all this crap to walk into our future together. I hope this helps in some way...

I love you Sarah. I wanna be with you forever. You're my reason for living. You make it worthwhile. 

Thank you anyone who stuck with me this far. It means a lot to me. 
Recently I had a moment to sit down and speak on rational terms with :iconsweet-doll-face: 

I had made a deal between us. The Deal is, that she will no long speak to or interact with :iconbefishproductions: and Mizz Befish will not Interact or speak with German-Cupcakes. 
On these Happy and very reveling new conditions, I would like to end the Boycott now that she has agreed to leave us be. 
I appreciate what German Cupcakes has done in this respect. Finally I believe that me and Mizz Befish can be happy together. 

I love you Sarah very much. Thank you German Cupcakes for being considerate to us both. I hope we can all be happy now in the end. Let not History repeat itself.

Thank you everypony for all of your support and everything you have done. 
I love BefishProductions so much. But apparently there are people who don't want me too.

Sweet-Doll-Face <------  Doesn't think I should be with Miss Befish. Aside from harrassment, bullying and hurting :iconbefishproductions: German cupcake has been blackmailing my beloved... trying so hard to break us apart. Thank you for anypony who supports us. Can we please end this? I just wanna be with my love.

German-Cupcakes has even flagged a comment on her channel where someone spoke the truth:
==================================================================================
"Everyone subbed to this girl needs to dump her like a sack of potatoes.  She has been cyber-bullying :iconbefishproductions: and is currently blackmailing her into breaking up with her boyfriend, whom she saved from suicide.  She seems to believe that blackmail is not illegal (it totally is), and that she has a right to crush someone to make herself feel better about her own life (which I'm guessing is pathetic).  You should distance yourself from her behavior until she straightens out her behavior.
==================================================================================
I love you BefishProductions I just wanna be with you. Can Sweet-Doll-Face please leave us be? This is not healthy or good for anypony. I don't care whats going on... who is right or wrong... Please. Stop. Leave us be. I am finally happy for once in my life. I wish no one ill will. 

I beg all and everypony, please... Let us be... I love Miss Befish. There is no reason for all these horrid things.

Here is a quote from Mizz Befish's Mom after I had asked her whether she knew about the Bully know as, "Cat" A.K.A. "German Cupcakes":

"Yes I know all about it  This has been an ongoing issue with Cat. I told her she is no longer welcome at our house and that Sarah has decided that their friendship is over. Cat seems to think that she can force Sarah to continue being her friend, but at this point we're done with her. Its sad that Cat has destroyed their friendship like this. Sarah has always been a good friend to her and she deserves better.  Thanks for your concern."

Here are journals on the same subject. People who would Vouch for this
Boycott This ArtistUsually I don't get involved with online affairs when it comes to harassment or bullying. I have experienced this problem a number of times since I was 14yrs old. From bullying, sexual harassment, and threats on my life, all purely online based. Even today I still deal with stalkers or negative online users who wish to hurt me in some way for their own personal gains.
However... after hearing this story, I simply cannot ignore the situation that is going on here. This particular issue involves actual physical harm and assault to a person...and for that I cannot stand idly by without saying this message:
I've been a short time friend of TheDirector :iconapolloheartlock: for about a month now, and had only just met his lovely new relationship, Chubz :iconbefishproductions: . First impressions are very important to me. When I first met The Director, he was a very low esteemed person, who had amazing talent and an incredible selfless personality that was always willing to praise other
<da:thumb id="523582749"/>
Boycotting this ArtistCatherine, http://german-cupcakes.deviantart.com/, has been harassing this person, :iconBefishProductions:, who is the girlfriend of :iconApolloheartlock:.  She has assaulted her and has been trying to blackmail the Director, gone after Sarah's parents, and other things.  This girl needs to be stopped.  Don't believe her sweetness.  I've heard from both Sarah and the Director of what this person has done.  It seems she has the school in the palm of her hands.  The very least I want to do is ban this person from DA so she has one less outlet to target this person.  Ms. Cat, what you're doing is wrong.  Please stop doing this.  I have no intentions of threatening you.  I won't stupe to that.  I will protect Sarah though.  If you do insist on threatening her, I will find a way to stop you.  So for your sake and all those connected to this, please leave Sarah alone.  You have nothing to gain from this.  Boycott this ArtistAll who are following Sweet-Doll-Face she has been harassing and cyber-bullying my friend BefishProductions and her boyfriend.  The person who owns this DA account is a bad person and you should not give her the praise she gets.  She has even tried to blackmail them to break up.   Boycotting a Particular ArtistEveryday I see stuff like this, I legitimately get angry, and have an internal fit inside. Recently, I caught wind that my friend, :iconApolloheartlock: , has recently been dating DA user, :iconBefishProductions: . However, she has been getting harassed by other DA user, :icongerman-cupcakes: , for lord knows how long, ruining her relationships and manipulating the people in her life. If you follow German Cupcakes, she doesn't deserve the praise the attention she receives. She's a terrible human being, and the fact that she has nothing to gain from what she's doing utterly disgusts me to no conceivable end. BOY COTT THIS ARTIST!Catherine, german-cupcakes.deviantart.com…, has been harassing this person, :iconbefishproductions:, who is the girlfriend of :iconapolloheartlock:.  She has assaulted her and has been trying to blackmail the Director, gone after Sarah's parents, and other things.  This girl needs to be stopped.  Don't believe her sweetness.  I've heard from both Sarah and the Director of what this person has done.  It seems she has the school in the palm of her hands.  The very least I want to do is ban this person from DA so she has one less outlet to target this person.  Ms. Cat, what you're doing is wrong.  Please stop doing this.  I have no intentions of threatening you.  I won't stupe to that.  I will protect Sarah though.  If you do insist on threatening her, I will find a way to stop you.  So for your sake and all those connected to this, please leave Sarah Boycott this ArtistCatherine, german-cupcakes.deviantart.com…, has been harassing this person, :iconbefishproductions:, who is the girlfriend of :iconapolloheartlock:.  She has assaulted her and has been trying to blackmail the Director, gone after Sarah's parents, and other things.  This girl needs to be stopped.  Don't believe her sweetness.  I've heard from both Sarah and the Director of what this person has done.  It seems she has the school in the palm of her hands.Ms. Cat, what you're doing is wrong.  Please stop doing this.  I have no intentions of threatening you. I will protect Sarah and the Director though.  If you do insist on threatening her, I will find a way to stop you.  So for your sake and all those connected to this, please leave Sarah alone. There is no point in trying to manipulate others. Sarah and the Director are close friends of mine and I support their relat BoycottCatherine, german-cupcakes.deviantart.com…, has been harassing this person, :iconbefishproductions:, who is the girlfriend of :iconapolloheartlock:.  She has assaulted her and has been trying to blackmail the Director, gone after Sarah's parents, and other things.  This girl needs to be stopped.  Don't believe her sweetness.  I've heard from both Sarah and the Director of what this person has done.  It seems she has the school in the palm of her hands.  The very least I want to do is ban this person from DA so she has one less outlet to target this person.  Ms. Cat, what you're doing is wrong.  Please stop doing this.  I have no intentions of threatening you.  I won't stupe to that.  I will protect Sarah though.  If you do insist on threatening her, I will find a way to stop you.  So for your sake and all those connected to this, please leave Sarah alone.  Yo Boycott this Artisthttp://german-cupcakes.deviantart.com/
I don't normally do this but a friend of mine, :iconapolloheartlock: , has a girl friend :iconbefishproductions: who is being harassed at school by this German Cupcake person so me and a few others here on DA are boycotting this person. Just like a lot of us, we were either bullied before or know someone who was bullied and this has to stop now! I was never bullied before but I have friends who have been and gone through depression because of people like this.
After hearing what my friends have told me about this person, I am just appalled at the audacity of someone like this. This probably the only time I'll do this but this is where it stops now. When you're a member of this Brony Community, you're always among friends and family who will help you in your time of need.
  
<da:thumb id="523481928"/> Boycott This ArtistThis is something I NEVER normally do, but this is a special case.
german-cupcakes.deviantart.com…
:iconapolloheartlock:, has a girl friend :iconbefishproductions: who is being harassed at school by this German Cupcake person so me and a few others here on DA are boycotting this person. Just like a lot of us, we were either bullied before or know someone who was bullied and this has to stop now! I've been a victim of bullying and have been since elementary School, all the way till high School. So trust me, I know...
This is probably the only time I'll do this, something needs to be done. When you're a member of this Brony Community, you're always among friends and family who will help you in your time of need. 
Spread the word however you can all.
And do me (and everyone a favor) Don't return the favor to this person. That makes us no better then the person who started.
<da:thumb id="523493329"/>  Boycott this artist.Hello all, there are few things that get me spitting mad.  Hades is ticked off 
One of these things is Bullying in all it's forms. Now imagine how I feel when friends of mine are the target of bullying.  
Hmmm.  Uhm...?    I'm not happy right now.  Amara-noudintplz-9 vein 
Okay so here is the deal.  This chick :iconGerman-Cupcakes: has been harassing blackmailing and bullying my friends, :iconApolloheartlock: and :iconBefishProductions: for sometime.  Now what I would be doing if I was following her on any media would be clicking the unsubscribe, unwatch or what ever form of button is there, and then following that up with a little note to the admin of the sight.  
Thats just me I don't know about you guys.  Moriarty Emote (BBC Sherlock) 
And to little miss cupcake, how long is that list of people you hav
Boycott this artist
If there is one thing I cannot stand, is someone trying to break someone's happiness. Spread this message out to everyone you know.  My friend the Director needs the help he can, his girlfriend is being bullied by someone named German Cupcakes on dA. She must be stopped.
Really cool, I am now apart of the Frederator Network! I just finished my first animation under Freddy and have put it up on Youtube for all to see! I am planning on making some new changes to my channel, including a consistent schedule to which I will post things! preferably funny things for your eyeholes! For those who have not seen it yet:




Feel free to critique it! Make sure to like, comment and subscribe. Press your hoof on the watch button for more! 
See ya in the studios everypony.

-The Director.

I Just finished my new animation! I have been really building on my youtube lately! Sorry if anyone missed me! But, there is more to be watched and more coming soon! Please enjoy hope it makes you chuckle a little. Thanks everybody for the support. I am far more active on youtube, so if you want more of me, and more often, like comment and subscribe! But don't worry I won't completely ignore Deviantart!
So I just Recently Refurbished my Youtube Channel, It would be lovely if Ever-pony could Go and Frolic through my two videos with LIKE, COMMENTS, and magical SUBSCRIPTIONS!  
*Bro-fists, paws, hooves, and all other tentacle type things with everything in-betweens*
So please go visit my new channel and stay tuned for more PMVs and animations of all sorts. 

Im also always looking for peoples to work and collaborate with! CHANNEL>www.youtube.com/user/GGParmy&l… CHANNEL

www.youtube.com/watch?v=lhSLOP… < OH LOOK A HILARIOUS ANIMATED SHORT..... click it.
I had just recently finished working on a PMV (pony Music video). After 11 days of hell, It came out great and I WANT THE WORLD TO SEE IT! I actually want to make more... so if anyone likes it, I would gladly make more! I love animation so I was happy to make it. It was inspired by, and I used "awoken," by my heroes H8_seed and Woodentoaster.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=xYGNGE… < MY PMV 

And if you like my animation please Subscribe to my Youtube Channel

www.youtube.com/user/GGParmy/a… < My channel

If anyone wants to work together, I would love that. I am very much a collaborative artist!